KenKen

High Lows and Low Highs

2009-11-10T08:16:00.000-08:00

I've led the high life. Last year I raked in up to 40k in just 3 months. About half of it is gone, through my mistakes and misconceptions of the online trading. A small pie of that money has gone to unnecessary drinking, where the bottles came freely and stupors were all that we boasted off. Another went to luxury items, when I splurged on LV Gucci Mont Blanc Burberry and expensive phones.

I've learnt my lesson. How do the rich get richer? Why do the poor always remain the same as they always are, and they always will be ? It trickles down to the money blueprint we all have in our head. It might be innate, or otherwise influenced by the leaders around us. You might rake in 10 grand per month but yet still be penniless at the end of it. You might actually earn 2 grand per month but yet still pocket 1k at the end of the month.

This is it : You do not need to be rich by earning alot, You CAN BE RICH by spending lesser. This is the misunderstanding of many. I'm trying to lead a low life, not as in that of a peasant, but that of an ordinary young man trying to work his way up in life. I'm not raking in any income now, all that is left maintaing my expenses is that of the earnings I made last year. It aint alot, but can get me through not working for at least till end of next year.

Life is hard. Take it.

Shall sign off after the spamming of entries the minute I'm back blogging.
HAVE A FUCKING GOOD WEEK.

It's Different.

2009-11-10T07:58:00.000-08:00

Things are no longer the same now, many a times I ponder over how the rich become richer and the poor actually stay how they are. I have been to countless seminars and talks that help build confidence, but of all, It boils down to who we really are.

Life is easy for almost anyone.
Go to school,
Get a degree,
Find a job,
Stay for 30 years,
Retire hoping that our CPF can last till our last breadth.

But that is not how I wanna live. I wanna live..
1) a happy life
2) with my loved ones
3) without worring about the price on any menu or tag that i see, that I can buy what ever I want.
4) that I do not have to face a boss to work everyday.
5) that I wont need to drag myself outta bed just to go to work.
6) live the financial freedom life.

Of course, talk is cheap. It aint easy. Look at the people all around us, even including my mom and dad, and even yours too. They are ( well almost all ) are going to work every other day so that they can support our miserable life. I wanna raise my kids another way, I wanna be financially stable so that when my kids are out, I can be there for them when they need me. To nurture, to love and raise them; american style. I wont tie them so tightly like asians do, i beg to differ about the way of life of us yellow skinned versus that of the whites. Till then, we shall see.

TOWARDS MY GOAL.

I AM BACK.

2009-11-10T07:53:00.001-08:00

I know it's been a while, I apologize.
Have been busy with my Car, Klaire;
Have been loving my girl, Jiayi;
Have started school, SIM;
Have lived the low life in the holidays, period.

Time has proved only to be healing;
Drive is all that I need to believe.
Self doubt is slowly taking place;
I need a sanctuary of confidence:

The look of passion and fire in my pupils dilate
the crimson sorority pain i feel within.
The force the drive the strength i need;
to challenge the will of life of many.

That that endeavours always fails;
With which tags only a lesson inbound.
The multi tribulations that occur everytime;
only make me stronger by the day.

I AM BACK.

2009-09-01T02:39:00.001-07:00

I tried living my life normal and as ordinary;

BUT FUCK IT;
LET'S JUST FUCKING LIVE LIFE AS IF IT WAS THE LAST DAY!

LET'S DRINK,
LET'S PARTY,
AND HAVE FUN !!!!!!!!!!!!!

=)

2009-06-27T02:22:00.000-07:00

1 year. 100k.
Watch me.

2009-06-27T02:13:00.000-07:00

Hello all, I'm at the Singapore Expo helping out Success Resources with their new seminar. Key speaker will be T. Harv Eker, the author of "Secrets of a Millionaire Mind", the best selling book that will unveal the secrets of getting it rich through a diversified portfolio.

I've been here for the past three days and have learnt alot during my stay. I came to realise that one has alot of ways to diversify the portofolio into different risk areas, of low risk, medium risk, and high risk.

Low risk - Bonds, Securities, Land Banking
Medium risk - Land Banking, Natural Gas Investment, ATM investment, Diamonds.
High risk - Commodities, Stocks, Indices.

Knowledge of how to earn a massive passive income was flowing freely in the atmosphere. As much as I could I tried to absorb as much information as possible whilst working. Working hours are long, pay's like peanuts. But I just hoped to learn as much as possible from the wise and rich speakers.

Speakers ranged from stockbrokers to investors of Argyle pink diamonds, Stock portfolios, Natural gas investments, Technical indicators, ATM investments, Land banking, and many more. Spoilt for choice, i lay aback in my seat and absorb as much as i can from theese knowledgeable saints.

I wanna be like them.
I will be.

2009-06-18T06:03:00.000-07:00

Since my starting days in SIM I've come to know a very good friend.

One that's so simple.
One that's so naive.
One that's so fragile,
That part I'd wish you don't see.

He comes along as a soft spoken man.
A creature of kind intent.
He holds a heart of gold,
Lessons he has thought me many fold.

He taught me how to be humble, not by his words, not by his dressing, not by how he speaks; But each and everyone of his actions carry along a strand of hope and kindess. One which knows no boundaries.

He taught me that no matter how rich we dress ourselves up, if inside we are nothing but a vacumn of colours, we are nothing.
He taught me that no matter how loaded we are, we are nothing if we dont love our neighbour as oneself.
He taught me that goals should be set ethically, with which friends should not be used as steppin stones.
He taught me that we should be humble, always thatnkful for anything and everything that was given to us, by the society, by our parents, or even our friends.
He taught me alot of things, with which i wont be here today.

Thank you Zhi Hao,
Thank you for believing in me. I will get out of this shit and make it even bigger than what i could do.

WATCH ME.

2009-06-18T05:54:00.000-07:00

Hi all. It's been a while.
Have been bumming around all day, running, gym-ing, swimming.
Training up for the year end marathon in which I dont even have the slighest confidence of finishing it. It's gonna be a challenge for me, a limit i set for myself to break.

I've lost in stocks. Burnt my fingers in the stock market. Will be officially declared bankrupt by end June if i dont settle the issue by end July. Sigh.

Mid life crisis at 22.

My mentor told me i'd experience my mid life crisis in my twenties. A mid life crisis, as deemed from the words itself, implies that halfway through your life, you'd be so stressed up by financial and future burdens that we cant sleep well, cant enjoy ourselves, cant splurge; and a time where while everything seems so good on the outside, it's just nothing but an empty vessel inside.

I burnt my hands in the stock market. Am in debt, but I'd like to say that i learnt alot of lessons from it. I believe it's a medium that can generate money so fast you can make what people make a year in just one week.

Along the way i realised that money is almost everything. To a certain extent, it can buy you friends, company, and maybe even happiness. I know i will be rich someday. It's only a matter of WHEN. Sigh. At least i know in the near future, my debt of 5 digits at the age of 22 is gonna be one huge life lesson to me.

Staying afloat.

2009-06-06T14:52:00.000-07:00

It's intriguing to why anyone can be like this.
Love should be free.
Love sholdnt even be without a fee.
You're disappointing to no degree.

I contemplated what to do;
recollected what we did;
Tried to make myself a fool;
just to be up to your bid.

No one will feel me;
Nothing can replace the feelings.
Everyone can come in;
with which all are just nothings.

This is me saying i love you.
It hurts me to see you
It hurts me to see us like that.
Bros forever,

IK.

The days in Support company..

2009-06-01T10:43:00.000-07:00

With great expectations come great hopes.
With great hopes come greater limits.
With greater limits comes greater stress.
With these stress we will fight.

With this fight we shall fight.
With this fight we shall hold.
With this hold we will bond,
With this bond we will stand.

I want to break free.

2009-06-01T10:36:00.001-07:00

Torn.

So much i have to do.
So little i have to do.
So high the expectations,
So low the qualifications.

Pris commented i will only be happy if
I lower expectations of myself.
Words cant express what i feel inside.
Regret on what i covet is beside.

I cant do it anymore.
I cant do it anymore.
I've changed.
There's no more flame.

All alone the winter flakes engulf my soul;
With which flames implode from a foe.
Black and gray the sillouhettes gather,
My heart drops like a feather.

Close so dear they seem to me,
Far yet near they will always be.
Mom and Dad dont understand me,
But they've been wantein to change everything about me.

A picture speaks a thousand words,
A poem represents a thousand woes.
A teardrop from a broken heart;
A broken wing from afar.

This is ken signing off.
Time to be a normal person.
A humble one;
Normal like the others.

Dont think I'm different.
Dont think I'm extra ordinary.
Dont look up to me.
Dont think I'm a leader.

2009-05-21T14:37:00.001-07:00

PICTURES SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS;
IT'S BEEN A YEAR :)

Somehow I'm looking forward to reservice.
=)

2009-05-21T14:26:00.001-07:00

EX - FUCKING XAMS ARE FUCKING OVER.
HELL YEAH :),
BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT, IS ,

TA - DA !

I'VE GOT MY CAR !
MY BLACK CHEE-BIC ( CIVIC )

ha.
Fucking excited.
Damn cool.
Super nice.
So sleek.
Uber awesome.

LOL. Enough said;
Here are the pics of my 70k girlfriend :

My Quiz from QuizYourFriends.com

2009-05-16T22:05:00.001-07:00

How Well Do You Know Ken?
1) What do i like to do at pubs?
		drink
		talk to waitresses
		smoke
		make people drunk

Make A Quiz - Take This Quiz - View Scoreboard

2009-05-13T23:37:00.000-07:00

One more paper left to go, and i've been so unluckily fined 300 fucking dollars for a fucking piece of filter. With that, I wanna state my resolutions and achieve it.

Hard as it will seem,
Mental as it would be,
Even if i dont achieve it,
I wanna be halfway there.

1. Quit smoking by end of May.
2. Train for a marathon ( Standard Chartered marathon in Dec )
3. Register for a property course ( July 2009 )
4. Work as a trader ( June 2009 )

And these are just the outlines.
I can do it.
I will,
I should,
I must.

Kenken.

2009-05-13T23:36:00.000-07:00

NNB I JSUT GOT FUCKING FINED 300 DOLLARS FOR THROWING A CIGARETTE BUTT.
IN FRONT OF MY SCHOOL SOME MORE.

MY RESOLUTION WAS TO QUIT SMOKING 2 DAYS LATER.

AND NOW.

COOL.

RESOLUTION GIFT.

COSTING 300.00 SGD.

FUCK.

2009-05-07T07:11:00.001-07:00

Just finished one paper today. Principles of Accounting. I swear it was one of the worse topics i ever covered in my life.

I prepared all i could.
The paper stood there all still.
Dialing the numbers on the calculator,
I know soon it's gonna be over.

I'm a different person these few days,
I swap wrong words, walk sideways.
I dont talk much,
I just lay back and crunch.

1 more week till freedom.
1 more paper tomorrow.
1 more week till my Civic.
1 more thousand in stocks.
1 more try at anything.
1 more chance of saving it.
1 more attempt to revamp.
1 more;
1 more.

1 last chance.

2009-05-02T11:09:00.001-07:00

studying like mad.
moodless.
speechless.
emotionless.
aimless.
goaless.

2 more weeks.

www.pamper-princess.blogspot.com

2009-04-24T20:45:00.000-07:00

Have been studying so much, only to realise how much i didnt know. I wanna get Honours in my degree, maybe even a first class honours. Studying doesnt look so easy, or maybe it aint for me. But I'll force myself to study. Countdown to major exam in 12 days. WHERE GOT TIME.

Study needs discipline, which maybe i lack. There's only so much one can do to achieve what he wants. I want. I hope, I wish. But nothing is more important than the results. Let the achievements prove everythng.

Hao says I'll get a distinction. Thanks for having the faith in me. I wont say anything for now, but, We'll see.

=)

2009-04-16T07:33:00.001-07:00

Spent the last few weeks studying, the next few weeks wont be different either. Maxing out 14 hour study days have been a norm for me, I'm gonna make sure i'll do well in this exam.

Let the actions speak louder than words.

:)

2009-04-16T07:33:00.000-07:00

2009-04-11T05:27:00.001-07:00

Finally i bought my car.

It's black.
Coming soon;
The 09 model of Honda Civic.

In Black.

15 May 2009 :)

After so long.

But the car below looks so hot.

The Singapore Stock Exchange

2009-04-06T02:42:00.000-07:00

And as we all live through our daily lives and trust our utmost strength into believing the ordinary is all about nothing except allowing our mindless bodies to fulfil our brain's actions, some people allow money to work for them.

I believe the Stock Exchange is a money - rich medium that allows wealth to flow freely. Billions of dollars are transacted everyday in the numerous orders that flood the trading floor. People build their wealth in this manner. Others lose everything they had in one night.

Ignorance. Would you play chess if you didnt know the particular pieces' abilities ? Would you send a rookie cop on a top secret imporatant mission ? Or would you even do anything you did not have any knowledge on?

I guess the answer is crystal. Before going into the stock market, we should be well equipped with the certain correct foundation of basics that is neccessary. People lose maybe because of ignorance. Others win because they have a set of strict priciples where they adhere to it firmly.

The stock market is based on fear and greed. Prices of stocks, indices, securities, bonds, commodities and equities roller-coast up and down based on just these 2 emotions alone. If you can conquer these 2 emotions, easily you will be able to see the money rolling in.

I play the stock market too and i would say that as a student I'm earnign a fucking comfortable income as I mug through the endless books through the library. I believe that if I can do it, YOU would be able to do it to. I wont say it is easy or that it is confirmed that one can make money like no one cares. There are some downturns too. Where if you may, I'd like to enlighten you also.

A speaker once said, " If you would like to learn, the door of learning will automatically open for you."

IF ONLY YOU DARE TO LEARN.

2009-04-04T15:22:00.001-07:00

Beautiful girls. Ugh they irk me.
Ask me why but i don't know why.

2009-04-04T15:19:00.000-07:00

Yay. Finally I'm driving. Quite stressed at times when there're alot cars. LOL. Ask Ling and BV see how stressed I was. haha.

Well, practice makes perfect :)

2009-04-04T15:04:00.000-07:00

Was at powerhouse just now. ran into a couple of friends.
Met one of my last time "quite-close" friends that used to hang with me and club together. He's doing quite well now ( I think ) but was just wearin a t shirt and jeans, like what he normally does.

I was thinking he'd actually grown up all these years. Was speculating he had matured; Had contemplated he was now more career minded.

AND THERE HE WAS PICKING A FIGHT WITH SOME OTHER KIDS. Was pushing his way through to get to the other adult wannabes that wanted to retaliate. I was standing a safe distance when i heard the vulgarities being used sparingly. Ha. I chuckled. And looked at him. And then i turned away in dismay. After all these years he's still a kid at heart; believing fists mattered more than anything.

What's the matter with him? Holding onto the belief that ego was more important than air? Or the analogy of his "so-called-bros" were going to be with him till the very end ? Or the egoistic pride that always get in the way ? Why cant he say a sorry and walk off ?

I stood there intrigued with disappointment and turned my back to take care of my GOOD DRUNK FRIEND, WHOSE PATTERN MORE THAN ELEPHANT'S BADMINTON.

:)

2009-04-02T23:02:00.001-07:00

FINALLY.

IN STARK CONTRAST; 2006.

THE SHOCKER; 2001.

Think I've grown fat after these years.
Look at the pics !
Miss P says I'm always fat.
Ha. Those days.

2009-04-02T02:18:00.001-07:00

Seven Thousand.
Gone.
Maybe car also gone.

Honda Civic, June ?

2009-03-21T22:48:00.000-07:00

Now as i sit on the stone-metal monument outside my institution, the shady facade of the leaves canopy mask the sunlight as the sun rays fall lightly onto my face and shine into my eyes. The weather was undoubtedly serene. I lift my cigarette and gasp more nicotine into my already-black lungs.

I witnessed to many expensive cars on the road. BMWs, Lexus, Porshes and abounding more models. Mostly driven by agely people, otherwise I dont think much young graduates have the ability to substain the payments of a luxury car.

Actually I'm jealous and angry everytime I identify such automobiles on the road. I'm jealous because I know I have the ability to compass such a establishment, but not now. Zhi Hao says I shouldnt be envious of what other people have, otherwise it would mean that I allowed other people or objects to define who I was.

That set me wondering : From my life changing incident I knew that I was an effable chameleon, a genial man that can create fast with everybody and anybody. Some portray my conciliatoriness as being fake, but if anyone knows me, they would be able to see how well i socialise.

I'm already 23. I've got no savings YET. No girlfriend YET. No stock achievement awards YET. No trading peak medals YET. No career YET. No degree YET. No masters YET. No car YET. No thousands in my bank account. No businnesses in my name YET. No first million YET. No condo YET. No BMW YET. No clients YET. No recognition for anything recognisable YET. NO NOTHING. But, of all, the keyword is, YET.

WATCH ME.

2009-03-19T09:18:00.000-07:00

Might be considering an internship in America.
Be it trading, or banking or any where in the finance sector.
Contemplation will get me no where.
So Imma call the company to check out the details.

Quoted from my bro schoolmate :
"Time is just like cleavage,
Squeeze abit got liao"

-Sergeant Kum

2009-03-15T06:20:00.000-07:00

Enough Said.

2009-03-15T01:10:00.000-07:00

Enough said, this is one major aspect of you that has changed. I said you've changed. But i never said it was good or bad. There have been good and bad. And bad as it may seem, I NEVER ONCE DESPISED YOU FOR BEING MY BRO. I'm lost now. Lost at the speed and aspect of which you changed. And how you changed.

Success is nothing without friends. Success is being flexible. Success is being powerful where powerful is the ability to influence people. I dont what to say anymore. I'd seen you grow from the guy in camp. How we been through the darkest of challenges. Now are we gonna fall out because of women? We've been through the woes no alison can understand. Aliased from your point of view, success and earning money is one thing. But even if you are the most successful man i the world, if you have no friends and family, THEN FOR WHAT?

It's only demoralising to see things from this point of view. Love is love, but we can't live on love alone. Friends is friends, but we cant live on friends alone. Money is important but it cant buy everything. I was rich once and i realised the impact on me was that it only made me cocky and more arrogant. I gained a alot of friends, but only a few true ones.

But i only have a best one.

Taiwan : Our first chiong sua.

Taiwan : RNR

BH : BQ

Joshua's Wedding : BH

Drunk : Us again.

Only one.

2009-03-14T01:01:00.000-07:00

Exams are finally over. What should be done now is not chill, i.s to study even harder from the mistakes i learnt during the prelimaries. Kinda realisd the more one studies, it's not the more he learns; It's the more he knows he doesnt know.

There can be no end to learning. Maybe studying can have a limit. But in life, everything is about learning, modelling and imitating the inner core intentions of anyone you wanna replicate. Success is easy. Success isdefined as getting what you want.

BUT, what do you want? By when? Would you know the obstacles that might lay ahead and what you will do in order to overcome them? Will you, of all, dare to even try to fail in the first place? Will you even leave your comfort zone to explore the unkwowns? Would you give anything and everything up to achieve what you want ? And lastly, even if everyone around you is telling you not to pursue your dreams cause it might seem to far fetched, would you stay strong and maintain your stand ?

Go for it. Go for anything. Go for your dreams.
Dont stop,
Never falter,
Always try to,
Dare to fail.

After exam's requisites :
Childhood Loopholes :

Drunken Horseriding :

Whatever.

Champion Smoker :

Mr Sleep God :

2009-03-13T04:14:00.001-07:00

Kids blogging about fucking bullshit.
Adolescents quarreling about irreplacable motions;
In a demeanour only delinquents do,
only to deem them more besotted.

Fucking grow up.

2009-03-13T04:14:00.000-07:00

Kids blogging about bullshit.

2009-03-10T23:44:00.000-07:00

We humans are all creatures of habit :
Have you ever wondered, the many minute errands that we do everyday, the numerous actions that we make all the time are all habitual? We go to the same cubicle every time we visit the toilet; we sit at the same spot to smoke or study, we exhibit certain exact behaviour at particulr places at anytime of the day; and alot more examples.

BUT , WHAT IF, what if we could all do the reverse instead? Ever thought of what would happen if we try new actions, execute new activities, do things all from a different perspective, replaying all the past memories in a manner no software could provide?

How about doing something that scares you everyday? Doing something out of the blue that no one could expect? Or would you just live your life like it's just on video, play , and play and keep on repeating the mundane activities of one's life.

Well, you live your life. I'll try to make mine interesting.

:)

2009-03-09T00:06:00.000-07:00

What you focus on expands. That's the universal law of attraction that whatever a man wants, and he does take enough action to work towards it, it shall come true.

There was once a person in my life, he told me this :
If I wanted something,
would I want it so much to risk losing everything?
And my answer was yes.

That was the reason to why i climbed my ex MLM comapany's ladder so fast. However, unfortunately, I left because of some internal conflict with my upline.

Taken from another perspective, why are people so downand negatively pessimistic about their lives? They think they cant. They believe they cannot do big things. They limit themselves. They curb their own beliefs. They despise themselves when no one does. Their biggest enemy will be no one else, but their own mind. Our minds and brains are strange because they work on the basis that what we want during the day, we think of it. When we sleep or dream about it, it propels our subconscious to push the invisible forces within ourselves to all towards our higher self.

You are what you think you are.

"A man is what he dreams"

- Ken S. K. B.

2009-03-05T21:25:00.000-08:00

Return on investments havent been that good for the 2 days. I made some mistakes durin trading and lost about 2k. Need to get rational and make frim decisions to my principal system of trading. Am trying to stop speaking chinese for some fucking i dunno why reason. And somehow I've been adding alot of fucking into my sentances and speech.

Went drinking.
Got high.
Puked.
Helped a friend.
Saw Jack.

:)

2009-03-01T22:33:00.000-08:00

Been monitoring the market for possible entry positions. Damn, i must admit, America's in fucking big shit. Their national Dow Jones Industrial index has been free falling for over a thousand points for the past 8 days, and it doesnt seem to be falling. I shorted 3 contracts on the Dow, let's see how it goes. :)

Asia's stock market aint going anywhere north either. Free fall for most of the mid cap stocks. A few examples are :
Keppel Corp - drop 50 cents in a week.
Capitaland - drop $1.70 in 2 weeks.
are a few that i have shorted and made a pile
And many more.

It's fucking obvious that the whole is in great freaking recession. No doubt it will be one of the greatest ( I reckon it's the greatest ) recession in mankind since industralisation. Make a guess on America's national debt till date ?

IT'S 10.84 TRILLION.
USD 1084,000,000,000
GOD BLESS US ALL.

And to end off with an anti climax,

I miss the drinking days.

2009-03-01T22:30:00.000-08:00

Haven't been bloggin in a while. Have been muggin my balls into Economic textbooks and rummaging the reference texts on fuckin Accounting. Damn these accountants ain't human ! Fingers are sore from nudging the bloody calculator. 3 more papers to go man. Fuck the fucking school of examinations. Damn the damnationed douche bag that reinvented maths and econmics. And last but not least, fuck Indians for inventing math.

2009-02-25T18:11:00.000-08:00

Well i finally passed my Pracital Driving Test. It made me hell of a nervous wreck whilst i could not even walk properly to the car. The whole journey in the car was a killer. Every second was like hours. Cold sweat trickled down my inner calve as i stepped into the car and put my leg on the pedal. Did parking, ramp shit, and roundabouts, and some fuck driving, like fucking totalling 23 minutes only.

When the fucker ( tester ) asked me to return to the centre, I was like, "ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? SO FAST " Then I told myself : "Zhee bai siao liao" (This time die already in hokkien) And arrived back at the centre. As I was waiting for my result slip, I lay in grey angony there as the seeds of anticipation rushed through my balls.

And then , I got it. 18 fucking demerit points. Fuck, i passed. Finally.
I guessed the visualisations and self motivation did help after all.

2009-02-23T20:41:00.001-08:00

Dow Jones is falling. Falling big, falling great.
This whole recession is getting bigger before any of us can know.
Brace yourself.
Singapore shares are plummeting too.

2009-02-23T20:14:00.001-08:00

Happy Bday Sis :)

Be Strong.

2009-02-23T20:04:00.000-08:00

NOW let me visualise me opening the door to my car.
Let me imagine walking to take the the driving license.
I've waited so long for this.

ONE MORE DAY TO TP.

2009-02-19T05:57:00.001-08:00

Just got back from 2 days of chalet. Was Kelvin's 21st birthday.
Hope you enjoyed yourself man.
Happy fucking birthday bro.

2009-02-19T05:55:00.000-08:00

Hello everybody, I'm ken and i would like to make a declaration :
I WILL MAKE IT BIG.

2009-02-16T06:21:00.000-08:00

Banish Doubt :

By banishing doubt and thinking in no - limit ways, you clear a space for the power of intention to flow through. The power of intention is so doubt - deficient that when you're connected to it you see what you'd like to have as already being present.

I believe there are no limits. Limits were there in the first place because of our environment. And they were meant to be broken. Limits are also obstacles that heighten many from achieving their higher selves. Others will think they wont even attempt to do anything because of the set of believes within them that set them casted by their limits.

Never doubt yourself. You are what you are. In everything you do you only have two outcomes : Succeed , or fail. Would you rather wanna fail without trying or would you wanna fall after you;ve given it your best? Will you give a tough fight or even be strong in the face of adversity ?

Listen to yourself, feel your emotions and take on any life boulders with a never - say - die attitude. Since we were born to die, why not we all dare to fail?

2009-02-15T03:27:00.001-08:00

It's 7pm now. Just woke up.
Gonna go out sutdy already.
Aiming to study till four then,
go to SIM straight for lecutures
after a two hour nap.
It's the freaking examination period.

Geekarisation ?

2009-02-14T22:27:00.000-08:00

School boredom cessations :

Exams in 2 weeks.
TP in 2 weeks.
HELP.

2009-02-14T22:19:00.000-08:00

It's only been barely a year; you've changed so much.

Misses.

2009-02-14T22:14:00.001-08:00

A card she gave to me personally, of all The Power OF Intention Cards. A piece of paper, that within it, held decipherations of one being simple and kind. Being unproud of any glorified activity that happens. A card for everyone, but specially for me. Thank you Rossie. She didnt want me to repeat the mistakes i made half a year ago, a stage in my life where i thought so highly of myself that i didnt care about the people around me. It was me only, ME. So, I've already reflected; and am already changing. This way, the world seems a better place if only you STOP complaining.

Be Humble : Don't allow the apporval and attention of others to destroy you. Remain humble and grateful for all your accomplishments, and know that a force greater than your ego is always at work in your life.

Ken. S

2009-02-12T10:40:00.000-08:00

Grasping The Essence of Infinity :

If life is infinite, then this is not life. Graspin this concept will connect you permanently to the infinite Source of Creation that intends everything. By seeing yourself as an infinite being, the fear of death is forever eliminated.

Dr Wayne Dyer W.

2009-02-12T05:00:00.001-08:00

Find Your Purpose :

If you want to find yur true purpose in life, know this for certain : Your purpose will only be found in service to others, and in being connected to something is far greater than anything else.

Were you meant to serve in this life ? Were you born to lead a boring life ? Did you start and end life on a monotonous level ? How can you make your life a more interesting one ? What can allow you to reach out into the hearts of the people you love and touch their soul? Will you dare to lead and take on challenges like a silver knight does?

Everyone has a purpose.
Do you ?

Ken Siaw K. B.

2009-02-12T02:10:00.000-08:00

See The Beauty In Everything :

AS you awaken to your divine nature, you'll begin to appreciate beauty in everything you see, touch, and experience.

Everything happens for a good reason. Be it a scolding, a loss of a mobile phone, a close encounter with death, discountinuation of a friendship, a quarrel, anything, anything bears within it a fruit of better or future benifit. Be it a lesson, a teaching that will guide you to your greater purpose in life : Not to regret anything you do.

Ken Siaw K. B.

2009-02-10T19:01:00.001-08:00

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLO !
CRAZY STUFF LAT HAPPEN IN SCHOOL.

=)

1. Lumber one : MR ZHANG JIAN LIN ( Economics Lecturer )

The best lecturer with le most bombastic english ever. He picked up a call during lecture. Thought LE WHOLE CLASS didnt know, and walked behind le whiteboard to talk to his sweet heart. I should have snapped a vid and sent it to SIM board.

2. Number 2 : The level 87 sleeper. In class. Tutorial some more. Sleep and write and write some more. Pro right.

3.

4. Another random photo of me. :)

5. I fell asleep to wake up to find my hands this way, and i got the shock of my life. It does feel like a woman :

Thanks Eunice.

6. Boredom calls for uncalled re-enactions : Keep helmet on to prevent cancer and oral ulcers to form :)

EXAMSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

2009-02-10T18:56:00.000-08:00

I have a deck of cards; given to me by a small person with a big heart. And I wanna share it with everyone. It's a deck of cards, every of which holds a phrase with an important paragraph to it. The words are simple, however they carry deep decipherations.

Lap,
Ponder,
Think,
Reflect,
Improve,
Leap,
Intergrate
Advance. MOVE ON.

The Power Of Intentions :

The power of intentions is the power of love and receptivity. It asks nothing of anyone, it judges no one, and it encourages others to be free to be themselves. Remember : you were intended out of love, so you must love in order to intend.

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

2009-02-09T19:34:00.000-08:00

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..........
SO FATIGUED.
Been awake for more than 30 hours now.
Stayed up the whole of last night just to study.
Damn i'm becoming a nerd.
Maybe i wanna be labelled as a geek.
(Although i know i dont look like one)

Exams round the corner.
I will make this count.

TP on 25.
I will make it even more count.
I'm so tired.

Goodnight everybardie.

2009-02-05T08:26:00.000-08:00

SORRY.

Forgive me for being egoistic.
Forgive me for being proud.
Forgive me for being spastic,
When the whole world frowns.

Forgive me for being self centered.
Forgive me for being so blue.
Forgive me for being straightforward,
Sorry for not being true.

Sorry if I have hurt you,
Sorry if you hate me,
Sorry if you despised me,
Sadly I wanna flea.

Sorry for pushing around too much,
Sorry for caring about myself,
Sorry for casting doubts to munch,
Sorry i wanted to help.

Sorry all.

2009-02-05T08:19:00.000-08:00

If only he could leave me alone. Just fucking leave me alone. Let me lead the life i want. And be there only whenever i need him. The fucking fact is that he does not let go. I want to grow up. In fucking fact, I'm already 23 this year. And still face this kind of FUCKED UP shits early teenagers were dealt with by their ever-so-worried-parents.

My Dad. He's one is a million. More of the bad side, sad to say, he controls my every movement day in and day out. He can ask me to do everyday things like bathe, leave exactly 60 minutes before sch WHEN MY SCHOOL IS SO NEAR MA HOUSE. To drink water, wear this shoe out of fashion or no ( WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU KNOW ABOUT FASHION ) or do this do that or even cut my fucking fingernails. LIKE I DONT KNOW THAT I NEED TO DO THIS AND THAT ?!

All these stuff are stuffs that everyone and anyone knows what to do. And i HATE; HATE people telling me what to do and how to do things. Especially how i live my life. If you look at me, and you look at my little younger brother 2 years younger than me, I reckon you wont believe it. We grew up in the same family. We were fed the same stuff and brought up under the same conditions. It's just that i choose to interpret all these dily happenings that makeme so much more different than him.

It doesnt matter how i feel anymore. I give in. I wanna be normal. I wanna know how you feel. I wanna let you feel what i want you to feel. I wanna be ok with everyone and anyone.

2009-02-05T08:18:00.001-08:00

FUCKYOUDAD.
LEAVE ME ALONE.

2009-02-04T08:02:00.000-08:00

I had one of the most unexpected talks with people i'd never expected yesterday. At 12 midnight i went out for supper with my SIM friends; Ernest and Rossie, and we chatted about every little boring aspect about life. I always thought they were normal people who just lived their life everyday being woe trouble free.

And then we started talking about each other's character. This trio actually had alot of similarities. Moreover when Rossie extracted the essence of my personaility, I got shocked. Some of my traits that even I did not realised, she lashed everything at me like she knew me from the minute I was born. Even, at someone her age ( She's from China ) , a foreigner, she knew the importance of separating the intention from the behaviour.

Separatin the intention from the behaviour is a very important thing in everyday life. Be in encounters with friends, foes, lecturers, parents, colleagues, bosses or anyone, never ever ever mistake or deduce a person's intention from his behaviour.

For example, should a mother lashing at her son mercilessly for not looking out before crossing the road, the behavior is that her scolding and scolding her son non stop, even to the extent of caning and slapping or warning her son. But what is the intention ? The intention of the whole scenario is because she loves her son so much that she does not want to lose him at all. She loves him. But she doesnt show it.

This is the problem with many people, be it guardians, parents or politicians. While majority of the people look at your behavious, beg to differ and notice their intention.

:)

2009-02-03T05:19:00.000-08:00

And as we all push ourselves to break the limits and integrate into our more successful self, we unknowingly influence the people around us. While many join in along the way and have fun, others scrutinise with skeptism and scorn you like a rat.

And as we attempt to approach all friends we have to pull them up to get to where they want to, some apparently pull us down too. But we mut know our roots. I will always lend a helping hend to he who wants to learn. I believe anyone and everyone will always have a higher limit of beliefs waiting to be broken. There can be no barriers to how far one can go.

We should always be pushing ourselves. Maybe i should never stop trying.
Dare to Fail;

2009-02-02T08:45:00.000-08:00

Im gonna give it my best shot. Exams are round the corner. And i wanna take this chance to prove myself. It might seem i play alot. people judge me based on my figure of speech. From their brief encounters of me or maybe even stories that numerous tell them. I am just but a normal person. I might seem that i play alot. E**** thinks my behaviour is childish. Well I wanna thank you for having that thought and bringing it across. But i will make use of this opportunity to let you see I am not what you see on the exterior.

Know me better , and you might be shocked.

Dont treat me like im better than you. Dont treat me like im superior to you. Dont act as if im the leader or some cult chief. I am just but a normal man. I need time to prove that. Maybe not now. But in the future i will make something happen. It's in the midst of planning but i only have one shot. One failed attempt will be all it takes to bring me down.

To all those that think my blog is boring, keep your hyporcritical opinions to yourself. I dont entertain those people who I think I'm wasting my time and energy on them.

Read if you wish,
leave you may.
Complaints at bay,
keep your thoughts.

We all deserve much better than this.

2009-02-02T08:43:00.000-08:00

Your words pierce through me like a thorned arrow.
I reflect my everyday mundanities and ponder.
There is only one thing more now; Sorrow.
Your actions prove to me like a river.

2009-01-22T03:03:00.000-08:00

Are we really who we think are ?
Or are we just a figment of peer pressure at work.
Are we who people think we are?
Less those that think below par.
That we trust no man is an island?
of which time burns.
When we love without reserve,
Is it nothing but we derserve?

Be yourself.

2009-01-16T18:30:00.000-08:00

It's been a long and tiring week for me. Mentally tiring, I'd say. Been busy almost everyday so i seem to be mentally burnt out. There are many things that i like to do, but there's only 25 hours in a day. I felt so honoured this week, I had dinner with a multi millionaire. It was a taughtful experience. How often would you have a chance to meet a millionaire ?

He traded on oil, like buying on selling crude oil. He has many businesses , including 28 shops for lease and for use; of which many he rents out to people. When i heard the number of prooerties he had, i was shocked. He owned a total of 60 plus properties, all for personal investment. He also had another 2 factories in china, an upcoming opening pub, and a hotel. God knows what else he has up his sleeves.

So i tried to speak tohim to see the program beneath this succesful dick. I tried to model him, using my mirroring skills to match his perosnality. But he was arrogant. He spoke with a blunt, sharp tone with his fingertappin the table to emphasize his every point. I and my business partner there were criticized beyond recognition. We wanted to just bring an idea across to him but neither did we expect that we had so many flaws.

Moreover, when i told him i was playing stocks i think i saw him open his eyes so wide a moth could fly in. He was like,
"So what are you doing now , ken ?"
"Oh im studying.............
AND playing stocks."
"PLAYING STOCKS"?
"Aiya you dont play la. Sure die one"
Although i did not really put much emphasise on what he said, i tried to model him. information that i shouldnt listen to, i'd filter it. Otherwise, i just wanna learn from this man. I queried his success story and attempted to learn as much as i could from him.

The dinner seemed like forever. His straightforwadness were like arrows of fire piercing through our souls, tearing us apart yet leaving a beautiful scar after each attack. I tolerated, for i dont often have dinner with a fucking multi miliionaire. After the dinner was over i sat down with Sean at the coffeeshop, trying to deduce what was the intention the man was bringing up all along.

Other days were spent with R, where we discussed our business together. Progress was slow, but it was picking up. He'd be flying to Indonesia and China to meet the prospects, while i take care of sthe stuffs in Singapore.

LIFE IS HARD.
BE HAPPYY.

2009-01-11T21:53:00.000-08:00

And all the thing are just falling into position. Things no longer looked that pessimistic anymore. We are just like what the universal law states : What you focus on expands.

Will be busy for almost everyday for the next few days. Programmes lined up back to back to back. I need to balance up my work life with my school life.

2009-01-11T08:30:00.000-08:00

The past week has been a rather unfolding one. I've wanted to do big things, set up businesses, start up companies, be my own boss. The past week alone many routes have been open up to me, and the entrepeuners that are all my friends started revealing careers opportunities to me.

I wont say anything about my upcoming business plans, yet. But stay tuned.

I take a look at myself, and then notice you again;
You disappoint me.
So much.
You take care of yourself.

2009-01-08T07:39:00.000-08:00

Back to blog whoring again.

Everyone has problems. It's 1230 am right now and im talking to a friend. There were times when she spoke to me and teared. I wanted to help her so much. I wanted to give her so much. But the world is cruel. I hope one day will come, when she will be brave enough to stand up for herself, be a lady. A different lady that everyone looks up to. A lady that knows what she wants in life. A lady that can bring herself to do the things her head tells her to, even though no matter how bad her heart yearns for anything she desires.

She's a loser in the game of love. But that's all for now. This girl goes by feeling from the heart. She doesnt use her head to think logically. And i hope thing will change. I hope that one that this very girl that i once thought was a young little teenager evolve into a terrific ambitious young woman that lets herself worry about nothing for the future.

She's a one that always messages me in the morning or even at the wee hours of the night. She's the one that makes me laugh with cock jokes and monkey phrases. She treats me like an older brother, always sheltering and protecting her from harm. That's why i dont wanna see her this way. I just hope she wake up from this dream.

And for you fuckers that think she's my girlfriend, you all can kiss my KENdy ass :)

She's my sis,

2009-01-08T07:07:00.000-08:00

Time to get back on my feet again.

Need to upgrade myself.
Need to stop playing so much games.
Need to go for more seminars.
Need to read more.
Need to be mentored more.
Need to stop behaving like young adults.
Need to start behaving like an adult.
Need to speak more educatedly.
Need to help more people on the way to success.

Need to find a girlfriend.
Let's do this.

Lost pictures last year.

2009-01-08T01:33:00.000-08:00

have been doing alot of thinking, till shortie talked to me. People might deem my behaviour as childihs, or even kiddy, but the utmost of importance is what lies in the head. ANYone can think, ANYone can dream. but not all can do. So i will just get my way giong , and do the stuffs that i wanna do.

It's a new year for all.
Let's grow towards our goals.

2008-12-27T13:06:00.000-08:00

And as we chatted for the few hours that lasted eternity, i came to realise that all of us had problems. Be it big or small, family or relatinship problems, life seems to have a bigger picture of us all. The people who are truly successful in life all overcame these problems to came to what they are today. They had to outwit and outclass people with the same difficulties. And most importantly, they had to outlast anyone in the same rat race with them :)

The 5 of us, Alson, Jiayi, Bevan, Ashley and me all faced problems and from the detached perspective, we all know that life will not be easy. It might look like life has in place alot of stepping stones for us to climb and get over, but only the strong are enough to face it on their own and overcome it. With nothing more but a trong mindset, this is what we are : FIGHTERS.

:)

2008-12-24T23:43:00.001-08:00

6 digit value business plan in the making.
God bless me.

Merry fuckin xmas everyone.

2008-12-21T22:52:00.000-08:00

So many things to do,
So little time for me.

I need to run.
I need to train up on my physique.
I need to cut my drinking.
I need to tan.
I need to gym.
I need to get my license.
I need to read more.
I need to earn more money.
I need to clear all my debts.
I need to figure a way to climb to the top.
I need to figure out my future.
I need to plan for my life.
I need to learn not to be greedy.
I need to be patient.
I need to learn to be impartial.
I need to model more successful people.
I need to stop worryin and take action.
I need to turn my life around even if it's dark.
I need to sometimes let other people teach me what to do.
I need to respect people more.

MID LIFE CRISIS AT 22.

So little time so much to do,
I'd rather spend one day with you.

2008-12-18T02:47:00.001-08:00

Maybe along the midst along all my wealth i forgot who i was. Maybe along the way of pride i lost track of what i really wanted. This will be a chance for me to find myself again. I look at others and then realise im falling behind too. But on my journey up again i will be humble. I will take things as and when they come along the way.

Guess what i need to do is just to study hard now.

Got see people take chopper and cut birthday cake before not.

Haha, but thanks ling.

2008-12-13T11:19:00.000-08:00

And as we ponder over our daily lives what we normally like to plan for the future endeavours, one man stands at 21 and releases all his hopes that support his breaths. It's not the same anymore, maany a times which i once felt things were still within control, but the bank numbers dont show. The accounts dont reveal a normal figure. Of which once that displayed 5 digit incomes every month, MOST if it is gone.

What lays left is just the foundation of where i started, nothing else is around. I've heard of the mid life crisis term many times, never thought it would once happen to me. Im worried for my future. It might seem normal for me to start life anew as just a normal spoilt brat of a rich fucker but i dont want to be one . I wanna be independent person. Im a student now, i cant work no matter how much i want to.

Imagine being almost close to bankrupt, at 22, and all my dreams for my car and house have been dashed. Imagine holding such high, maybe too high hopes of one's self and then everything comes tumbling now. I dont doubt my abilities, neither do i doubt that it is not my fault. I have been impatient, and greedy, and i guess it's all the most expensive lesson in my life. Accumulated losses of 30 - 40k have been the calculated hit. All my profits from the stock market have been evaporated. Watch your own back.

I tried to smile the past few days, but it all didnt come genuinely.

Sigh, the past few days have been torturous, and i still worry about the near future. It's been sometimes since i saw these miserable figures in my bank account.

But, I'll be strong..
Dont encourage me or motivate me;
I know what to do.

IT's been a while since i felt confident like this :

2008-12-11T06:24:00.000-08:00

BANKRUPTY 5 DAYS AFTER MY BDAY.
FUCK.

2008-12-10T07:41:00.000-08:00

This is my blog. I dont blog about my outings. I dont blog about who i go out with. I dont blog about what i do or where i went. I dont blog about who i see or who i meet. I blog about my feelings. So if this bores you, dont bother to continue or bookmark this page of bullocks.

I lost big in the stock market. You can say my dreams are dashed. The Singapore Stock Exchange was a threshold for me to accumulate my wealth. On good months 20 fucking thousand per month wasnt a problem. And i spent money like it was water. I spent it like no one's business. I spent 2k per month on liquor. And people around me liked it. And from there i noticed the friends you have when you throw money around. And i was disappointed in a few people. It's differnt now. I have no money. I owe people money. And all the happiness is short lived. I passed 6 months as a trader, thought it would be able to substain my labelled lifestyle.

At 21 i spent 3k per month buying label stuff. And i realised it was all for nothing. If i ever get to earn that kind of money again, i will save it all up. If i had a chance again i will ensure i live a normal person's life. There's no need to parade around in labels. All i get is recognition. And it doesnt make me any happier. I just wanna be a normal person.

I had a talk with her yesterday. She held a first class honours degree in Atuacity and i dont know what the hell it was. I scrutinized the way she spoke and searched for her programms under within. She spoke with an inner fear. But it was a feeling of unfamiliarity that ruled the air. She modernised the conversation with easy and slow words. We conversed like i was a kid and she was a teacher. It was like we were worlds apart. I felt so much like a child.

And then i saw the differnces spaces we lived in. I thought i was one of the best in my group, and then i compared myself with her. I reflected, and realised that the world i was in consisted of nothing but enjoy enjoy and enjoyment. I felt embarassed at the manner i expressed myself. I need to improve my demeanour. I cannot be portrayed as a hooligan. I cannot be pictured as a gangster. Nor could i feel like i was a low class person.

I hold high dreams of myself. And although it might not be obvious, it is also that i wanna show a happy side of me. There are many issues i have to settle with myself. All are within my grasp, and i need to bring myself up to the next level. Maybe for the next few weeks or months i will try to spend alone. I wanna concentrate on my studies too. It feels like i've already wasted a whole shitload of my life. And it's time to do something.

It cant be explained. You cant see it. Maybe you can only feel it. Watch me next year.

2008-12-09T08:27:00.000-08:00

AND FOR THE VIDEO OF THE YEAR,
THE SMILING DRUNK FELLA !

PARTEH OF DA YEAR.
ACTUALLY I NOT DRUNK ONE JUST HIGH.
IS YOU FUCKERS DONT LET ME WALK ONLY.

LOL.
HAD A FUCKING GREAT TIME LOVES :)

2008-12-07T04:05:00.001-08:00

HAHA. I THINK IM NOT GOING TO POST THE PICS. SO MANY LOR.
YOU ALL CAN GO LING'S BLOG TO SEE EVERYTHING.
I THINK SHE GRADUATE CAN BECOME JOURNAL WRITER ALREADY.

WWW.FOR-SAKEN.BLOGSPOT.COM

2008-12-07T00:51:00.001-08:00

THANKS ALL :

Thanks to all that attended my birthday celebration. I guess you all saw what you all wanted to see. Concussion of THE KENKEN. LOL. Well i reckon there were to many people at the time , i couldnt make everyone drunk. haha. but some were damn high lor. JACK ccb ah. pour for yu never drink wait so long. Like ah gua liddat. LOL.

And i remembered i fell down at Powerhouse. Haha. My memory that night lasted only till 3am. after that were only flashes of pictures around and i duno what already. Flashes at Shuling house, the cab, Ernest talking to me, then the next thing i knew i was on my bed. LOL

But it was a fucking enjoyable birthday. We met again, It was nice seeing and talking to you. I told myself after my 22nd birthday i will cut drinking. Start To stable down, less boat quay. Matured outings with matured people.
And my wonderful resolution :
I GIVE MYSELF 1 YEAR FROM TODAY TO EARN MY 100K :)

PS : Pictures in a while, waiting for Ling to send me the pics :)

2008-12-04T17:29:00.000-08:00

1 MORE DAY TO MY BDAY !
CELEBRATION AT ST JAMES POWERHOUSE TML !
ALOT OF DRINKIN TO BE DONE :)
I LAZY BLOG LA.
LOL.

GL HF GG.

2008-12-02T11:12:00.000-08:00

I am excited about my mayhemic day. But i think you guys are more into it than me. I reckon if that day i dont concuss i will put up a fucking good show for you all to see ok.

VOTE FOR YOUR FASTEST DRUNKARD :

1) ZHA HU PING GUO
2) THE FAT SPAMMER
3) JIAYIIIIIIIII
4) THE GIRL THAT LOVES BQ RIVER ( LING )
5) KERLYN THE TALKKERRRR
6) GUILONG SAUSAGE
7) GUOXUAN DRUNKARD
8) EMO MELMEL
9) BEEETHOVEN ( BEVAN )
10) KENKEN ( YAO )

LOL

2008-12-01T08:46:00.000-08:00

Wow, birthday havent reach all want me to die already.
Can see how much you all hate me.
Hahaha. NO FLAMING DRINKS ON SATURDAY OK.

This is what a Flaming Lambo and Waterfall did to me last saturday :

+

+

+

=

HAVE A FUCKING GOOD SATURDAY.
GOD BLESS ME.
HAPPY FUCKING 22ND BDAY.
6 DEC 1986 - 6 DEC 2008
PLACE OF DEATH : ST JAMES POWERHOUSE

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

2008-12-01T08:44:00.000-08:00

why my birthday like everyone more anxious than me like that.
want see show right.
lol.

2008-11-29T23:34:00.003-08:00

na bei. my birthday havent reach want make me drunk already. hahaha.

NEXT WEEK BDAY AT ST JAMES POWERHOUSE WITH TWO DUA PAO !
ALL SHALL DIE.

2008-11-26T08:35:00.001-08:00

I dont care what they say.
I think i motivated myself too much now, It's 1 and i can't sleep. I feel the fire within me, burning. I hunger for success but here i am stuck with some studying. Never the less i will give it my best shot. I dont believe in doing something half half. If i put my heart to doing something i make sure i make it a good one. I will make it through my degree.

I lay out my life's plan before me and i scrutinize any skeptism it may receive so as to achieve the limitless outcomes that possibly stretch it. I look at my foundation and oberved that what's above might not depict what liees beneath. I henceforth release myself into stopping doing what i want to impress other people. I will do what i can and what i want, not to impress, but so i will live my own life and not live my life for others to envy. Although it might seem i am doing very well now, it still aint up to what i feel or think it is.

The sky is limitless; or would i say space is limitless. And as i looked at it i am reminiscing the very moment this person spoke to me.
SDM : Ken, what is your targetted paycheck per month ?
Ken : (pondered for a fucking while), Three, four thousand ?
SDM : (Sternly) Then you will forever be worth that amount. ARE YOU WORTH THAT AMOUNT? THINK ABOUT IT. (And he walked away)

And i sat there motionless, and stayed on that thought for the next couple of days. I told myself there can be no value to what i am, and i will never work for a 2,3 thousand dollar job per month. The skies are limitless , you see, and Life depends not on other people, or Destiny, or Fate. It depends solely on yourself.

Look at both your palms. Do they tell you anything ? Will you allow other people to decipher your fate for you ? Or will you write your own story for other people to talk about with envy ? Will you ever step out of what you normally do just to achieve what you dont dare to do without experience at all ? Will you dare to fail, for most picture failure as a destination.

Failure is nothing but a journey. It will be bumpy. It will cut you when you fall. But why do we fall ?

SO WE CAN LEARN TO PICK OURSELVES UP.

2008-11-26T07:57:00.000-08:00

Enough said.
Anger is over.
No use feeling anything now.

I push myself too hard.
I aint dissappinted.
Anger at my stupidity.
Pissed at my rashness.

Let me make it big?
No way.
I will make it big.
NO MATTER WHAT.

2008-11-25T23:11:00.000-08:00

Black or White ?

or

?

2008-11-25T07:12:00.001-08:00

Black or White ?

or

?

2008-11-24T23:59:00.001-08:00

I guess what seems so near seems so far further away. I aint sad or dissapointed or discouraged. Just angry. Anger at the method and impatient way i did things. I only had one destinatino : Success with lots of money. But i wasnt keen on how to do it. And therefore i paid a price. A price most probably non of my peers can afford.

Today i stand before you, humble, willin to learn, and will not rush anymore;
With a loss of 15k within one week.

I will still :)

2008-11-24T07:19:00.000-08:00

I WILL SETTLE FOR NOTHING BUT THE BEST
I WILL EARN MORE MONEY THAN MY PARENTS COMBINED
I WILL NEVER STOP IMPROVING MYSELF
I WILL BECOME A MILLIONAIR BY 28 OR 30
I WILL SAVE 100K BY NEXT YEAR 6TH DECEMBER

I WILL DO IT.
I WILL MAKE IT.

IMPOSSIBLE REFRAMED AS 1'M POSSIBLE.

2008-11-24T00:36:00.000-08:00

Well, i guess i wont go down for the time being.

It seems the market is doing rather bad. ( SO I WIN MORE MONEY ). Lost a shitload of money for the past 2 days of trading. It aint ma my money that i lost. At least it's the money that the market gave me.

Thanks to all that gave me encouragement through the tags, messages and other forms. I was not down at all. I was not sad at all. I was just demoralised cause the future that i deemed so near suddenly felt so far far away again. Winning the money means nothing for me now, except maybe spending a couple of hundred dollars downing liqour like no tomorrow. I was just dissatisfied with the fact that i could not achieve me almost achievable goal of 100k. All within one year. With a 5 digit loss it did set me back for a while, ( AND I EMPHASIZE A WHILE ). Not 1 week, not 1 day, but just a couple of hours.

Those that know me know i wont go down easily. Maybe i dont go down.
Maybe. You could say I'm proud. But i guess i have my certain level of pride from what i do and what i gain. Talk to me about anything. I will be most willing to learn from you if I dont know what the fuck you're talking about.

Many thanks to :
SHULING,
JACK,
WEI XIANG,
ZHI HAO,
KERLYN

that had so much confidence in me that i could earn back whatever i lost again.

What i love :
Depict and Decipher:

2008-11-21T03:21:00.000-08:00

SPEECHLESS,

When i saw the numbers flashing across the screen. It was a huge number. It wasnt positive. It wasnt profit. It was a loss, a 4 digit loss. Combining just 2 days of trading, last night and today morning , i totalled losses of 10k. TEN FUCKING THOUSAND. Feel so disappointed with myself. Thought i surpassed everyone. The pride i was having in the past few days was gone. I need to go back and start from zero again.

I push myself too hard. But i wont go down.
No picturs depict how i feel today.

2008-11-20T10:02:00.001-08:00

wa piang. dulan. it's 230 am in the morning now.
i cant sleep.
i lost all that i earned today when i played the dow jones.
i buy up, it went down, i buy down, it went up.
maybe i shd just stick to stocks,
no more indexes man.
fuck.

losses of 3.5k USD.
NABEI.

2008-11-20T02:15:00.000-08:00

CONGRATS ONCE MORE TO ALL THOSE THAT ENTRUSTED ME WITH THEIR MONEY.

BEVAN WON 15 % of his capital TODAY.
JOSHUA WON 15 % of his capital TODAY.
JOSEPH WON 10 % of his capital TODAY.
DONG HONG WON 10 % of his capital TODAY.

AND LOOK AT THE AMOUNT I EARNED WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL TODAY.

I'll be waiting for the day i touch a 5 digit income PER DAY.

2008-11-19T07:25:00.000-08:00

CONGRATS.

Thanks to all that trusted me with their money to play stock for them. You've all won money from the stock market. I guess they too wanted something bigger in life. Not entirely on the monetary side, but at least they dare to step out of comfort zone to achieve what they want. They DARED to despite the odds of losing every single cent of their savings in the stock market. This is what each and everyone of them made, over a brief period of time.
Thanks for trusting me with your money.

Joshua : 95 % profit in 4 days.
Bevan : 70 % profit in 3 days.
Joseph : 90 % profit in 2 weeks.
Dong Hong : 15 % profit in 5 days.

You're rich? You wanna put your money in the bank with an interest of 1 % ?
Let's do it my style.
The Singapore Stock Exchange :)

This is the update for 191108. See if you make this amount per month.

I do it in a day.
Work smart.

2008-11-18T03:38:00.000-08:00

Let's hope i can win playing the DOW JONES Index tonight.

:)

2008-11-18T03:24:00.000-08:00

WINNING.

WHO WANTS TO PLAY STOCK?
HAHAHAHA.
AIMING FOR A DAY WHEN I WIN DURING DAY IN SGX
AND WIN IN THE NIGHT WITH THE US MARKET.
I TOUCH A FOUR DIGIT INCOME ALMOST EVERYDAY.
:)

2008-11-17T09:03:00.000-08:00

AGAINST THE WIND.

Once again i try to make things work,
Facing all the power of society.
Searching all the answers of the life
I will make it on my own.
Was i meant to to fail everytime
that doesnt mean it is my destiny.
Is that all that's left to me,
Confusion and memories.
But now the time has come,
No more running in the dark.
I want much more than this.
I really want it all.

Against the wind we run
To every place under the sun.
We've got so much power inside,
We will never give up.
Against the wind we go,
Towards the all new shore.
Together we'll forget the sorrow,
Forever it is gone.